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Trading Places: Halloween Review

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If you know me on any personal level you know that when it comes to horror movies I am the patron saint of Michael Myers. The original was released 2 years before I was born and since I was in single digits I have watched the Halloween movies and it is the one horror franchise that I hang my hat on. When it was announced that Danny McBride and David Gordon Green were writing a new Halloween and that it would be a direct sequel to the first movie, including tossing out John Carpenter's own Halloween 2 (which Carpenter has gone on record saying he is not a fan of), I was understandably intrigued.

So now through various sequels we are in 3 separate realities when it comes to Michael; the original, Halloween 2 with other sequels 4, 5 and 6, then the second reality comes after Halloween 2 with H20 and Resurrection and now we have a third with 1978's Halloween and 2018's Halloween as a direct follow-up. Confusing? If you are a horror movie or comic book fan it is normal. Also, …

Apocalypse Now? Shadow of the Tomb Raider Review

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Since 2013 the rebooted Tomb Raider series has been my second favorite video game franchise (behind The Last of Us). I have gone through the first game so many times I can normally finish it in 2 to 3 sitdowns and play it once or twice a year. And with that comes the completionist in me that has to play Rise of the Tomb Raider after each time I play through the first game. Rise made some great progression over the first game including making crafting more in-depth and making the terrain much more varied and larger.

Now 5 years later we come to the end of Lara's origin trilogy, Shadow of the Tomb Raider, which heads to South America as Lara continues her fight against Trinity from gaining the power to reshape the world. In doing so she ends up starting the apocalypse so...oops. Don't worry, that is not a spoiler it happens fairly early in the game and is the catalyst for the main story. This gives a great reason for Lara and Jonah to have some real tension between them and oft…

Spinal Tap: The Predator Review

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Remember when action movies in the 80's would just start? Like you go to the theater or fire up a VHS tape and you get the title of the movie and we are off to the races. Back in the day when movie were between 90 and 110 minutes and moved at a good pace while giving you some ultra bloody action, bad or dirty jokes and you didn't feel like you just raced an emotional marathon?

The Predator is here to remind you.

Shane Black finally gets a chance to write and direct a movie in the franchise he got his first real acting start before becoming one of the most prolific screenplay writers in Hollywood and a pretty successful director. For the most part The Predator works as sequel, albeit still nowhere near as memorable the original.

Basic movie synopsis: a Predator has come to Earth to give humanity something of use to fight off what is coming (no spoilers) and is hunted down by an uber-Predator trying to retrieve said secret. Put simply an uber-Predator is an 11 foot tall big mot…

Mustache Ride: Mission: Impossible Fallout Review

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When I walked out of Mission: Impossible Rogue Nation 3 years ago I said that Ethan Hunt had become an American James Bond. Of course that was the 5th movie of a franchise and you wondered how long they could keep up the string of success.

After seeing Mission: Impossible Fallout the answer is simple: as long as Tom Cruise wants to keep doing it.

What movie can claim that its 6th installment is the best one? Let's take a look.

On Her Majesty's Secret Service- Not as loved as it should be, but not the best Bond movie by far. Never a good thing when Kojak kills your wife.

X-Men: Apocalypse- Not even Poe Dameron can make this anything but a long bore. Olivia Munn dressed as Psylocke is the main winner of the time spent watching.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince- Nope, Goblet of Fire. Dragons. Mermaids. Harry with his pompadour mullet.

Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country- the most under-appreciated of the original Trek films. No Wrath of Khan even though Christopher Plummer …

7 Shitty Consoles Older Gamers Will Remember

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1. Atari Jaguar



-Because nothing says “reclaiming past glory” like a “64-bit” console with a controller that actually makes less sense than using a computer keyboard. Alien vs. Predator was admittedly awesome, but White Men Can’t Jump…


2. Magnavox Odyssey 


-Gets obvious points for being the first home console, but loses them all for having no sound and controllers that looked like you could give ultrasounds with them.
3. Vectrex



-Because who doesn’t want their video game console to look like the TV screen in the chest of Robocop 2?

4. Philips CD-i



-Besides giving us the shittiest Zelda game ever and having a controller that looks like a double-sided dildo head, it retailed for $700...in 1991 money.

5. 3DO



-The Steam Machine of the early 90’s. Made by multiple companies and way overpriced to compete in the home market, yet still sold 2 million consoles. Goldstar made one. GOLDSTAR!

6. Virtual Boy



-Imagine a 3DS that weighed 5 pounds, sat on a stand (because taping it to your head hurt, FYI), had …

Shit Family Robinson: Resident Evil 7 Review

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Quick quiz: What is the best Resident Evil game of all time. Ready? On the count of 3. 1. 2. 3. Resident Evil 6. What? I’m fucking with you. It’s Resident Evil 4. Although, I have a special place in my heart for Code Veronica: X, but maybe this is me wearing my Dreamcast feelings on my sleeve 18 years later. The reason why Resident Evil 4 was so great is the same reason that Resident Evil 7 is great. It throws away tried and true gameplay techniques used by previous iterations of the franchise, while keeping enough of the stuff that make it Resident Evil, and then dares you to not shit your pants. The best thing about Resident Evil 7 is its setting. The bayou in Louisiana has always intrinsically had a creepy factor to it, especially if you have never lived there and have watched anything like Hatchet, The Skeleton Key, or the first season of True Detective. Don’t worry, you won’t be going into the depths of Carcosa, but you may wish you had by the time you get finished explori…

Plenty Dreadful: Vampyr Review

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Remember when Assassin’s Creed: Syndicate came out and some were excited because the setting of late 1800’s London is a favorite of history buffs? I do because I was one of them. Remember when the game released how boring it was on a level unheard of in Assassin’s Creed games? I am including 3 which may the be the worst Assassin’s game ever. Well take that boredom and ramp it up to 11...or turn it down to…-11? I don’t know how boredom scales work. Is it like an opposite effect? I don’t know.
Anyway, that is Vampyr. 
Dr. Jonathan Reid has returned to London after serving in World War 1 and we begin the game with him waking up in a pile of bodies and he has a thirst for blood. Yep, our doctor is a vampire if the title was not enough to let you in on the news. He takes a job at a local hospital that lets you choose to save or sacrifice everyone. Patients, doctors, random characters. All for your dining pleasure.
The environment of 1918 London is pretty spot on. While not a true open world, …